Are you An Enabler?

Are you an ENABLER, allowing others to abuse you?

Having accountability is one of the characteristics of a healthy, kind, caring adult. You can only be accountable for our own actions and also set 
boundaries so you do not allow others to abuse you.

You will not become an enabler allowing others to abuse you IF you set boundaries; demanding others treat you with respect, kindness, do no lie 
to you or about you, do not take away your freedom and other rights and do not use cuss words when they communicate with you.

• If people treat you this way or do other disrespectful things to you, you respectfully and kindly must bring this to their attention and explain why 
it bothers you and ask them to please stop.

• If they refuse to stop, you should suggest they get help to figure out why they have chosen to and have a need to continue behaving in these 
harmful, hurtful ways.

• If they still refuse and continue treating you in these harmful, hurtful ways, you cannot have a relationship with them unless you want to 
CHOOSE to allow yourself to be treated this way which is abuse.

• Why would you choose to allow yourself to be treated in harmful, hurtful ways by others? You should seek help to determine why you are 
ENABLING others to abuse you. Also read books, articles and use other resources to educate yourself.

Enabling others to abuse you takes away your self-respect, confidence, beautiful heart and soul and causes many psychological, emotional and 
physical problems.

***A healthy individual would not allow himself or herself be an ENABLER and tolerate abuse of any kind.

***In addition, a kind, loving person would not take advantage of your vulnerabilities and abuse you. They would want to do the opposite; help 
you lead a healthy life trying to enrich you in healthy, positive ways. They would not abuse you for their own selfish needs without caring about 
your well-being.

Also, in many religions, it is a sin to treat others with disrespect, unkindness, lie to them, take away their rights and do other abusive acts.

Parental Alienation, usually occurs at the time of divorce when a sick, (not bad) parent teaches the children (which includes teens and young 
adults) to hate or fear their loving parent. This sick (not bad) parent does this so he or she can control the children and have them “serve” their 
depraved needs, (financial, emotional and others).

In the realm of parental alienation, many enablers are children, teens and young adults who are trying to learn what is moral and respectful as 
they grow and mature.

***It is horrible beyond words, that these youth are being taught that to be an ENABLER is normal and healthy. This is why doctors and others 
have proven that victims of abuse grow up and commit the abuses themselves as our society becomes comprised of more and more abusers.

This is why parental alienation and other abuses have risen to epidemic levels.

***No one EVER earns a right to abuse others. You don't pay your dues to be able to abuse others unless you live in an immoral, corrupt world.

“If not I, then who?” As many great leaders who promoted and stood for justice, morality and equality; including Martin Luther King, Jr., Thurgood 
Marshall, Thomas Paine, Gandhi, Ayn Rand, my wonderful Grandfather Ben and many others, and in many religions, God too: Every man, 
woman and child is entitled to truth and freedom and MUST NOT be abused and treated in immoral, unjust, harmful and hurtful ways.
I hope we begin to observe our behaviors to see if we or those we love have become ENABLERS. If so, please try to get them the help needed 
and use books and other resources to educate. I hope you found this information very helpful and useful.

***MANY PRETEND TO BE RIGHTEOUS BUT ARE TRUTHFULLY ENABLERS of abuse.
“Ignorance is not bliss” as the wonderful Judge I clerked for taught me.

We must be educated so we can help others.